HuMMMMus and Girl Time

I love this girl. I can't believe this pic was 3 years ago!! So it's a beautiful 76 degrees today here in New York City. I could NOT sleep last night, or this morning for that matter. So I figured I'd get up and start my morning routine. Visit all the job sites and send out about 30 resumes.

Julie came in from Staten Island today to hang out. I really miss her living on the UES. She brought her adorable little poodle Chloe, whom I've never met before since she couldn't have her in the city. PRECIOUS! First we went to grab lunch at Hummus Kitchen, the best hummus in NYC hands down. She told me all about her upcoming wedding and life in SI (ick, sorry Jules!). Then, of course, I yapped to her about my business (Energy Depot) and shoved some biz cards and information in her hand to distribute in SI to businesses that she or her fiance know of. Yay networking! We finished up with some Turkish coffee and then took Chloe over to the dog park at Carl Schurz on the East River. I fell in love a tiny bit with a little Maltese. Chloe was so exhausted she couldn't even fetch the ball toward the end of the day so we headed back home.

Catching up with 2 GREAT girlfriends this weekend that I haven't spent time with in such a long time has me feeling pretty blessed.

Reinvigorated! (What a big word for such a tiny blog)

I just had the best evening I've had in awhile. I'm a little amped, so I figured I'd take a few minutes to blog out everything on my mind.

My friend Natalia got me signed up with a focus group tonight that paid $20 (don't laugh, it's more than I've earned in the past month, LOL). I told my friend Moira, who I haven't seen in MONTHS, and she was down to do it too and then do dinner after to catch up.

The focus group was simple, lasted about an hour, and afterward we went to grab some sushi. (Celeb sighting - Dawnn Lewis from that show A Different World with Lisa Bonet, remember her?) I heard all about what Moira's dealing with right now personally and professionally, and I guess there really wasn't much to update her on about my situation... except for the business I started (and have been procrastinating upon). She was actually excited about it. That, in turn, renewed my excitement. She even wants to join the business too! We started tossing around ideas and came up with the plan to form a partnership. I think we're both at the ends of our collective ropes about working for other people and we're ready to branch out and be successful for ourselves instead of just making money for everyone else.

I'm already in the process of setting up my work schedule for next week, and now that I've BLOGGED it too, I literally have no excuse. I know she'll hold me accountable too, which helps immensely. I think maybe feeding off each other and reminding each other about the pay off will help so much with the success of the business. We've already begun devising plans of action.

After meditation and chanting last night, I was feeling refreshed spiritually, and after tonight I'm feeling refreshed for work action.

I'm not sure if anyone listened to the radio show I was on this morning. I wasn't particularly impressed with the suggestions given to me by the Life Coach. The 2 items of 'homework' I was given were, and I'm not meaning to be hypercritical here, irrelevant. I was told I should #1 see a therapist about my depression - no shit Sherlock - but who exactly is footing the bill? I'M UNEMPLOYED REMEMBER?? The 2nd piece of advice was to make a list of things to do daily including work - umm, she obviously does not know me, I'm the QUEEN of list making. I'm a personal assistant for goodness sake's. I'm a compulsive list maker, I have lists ALL over my apartment. On my wall, in my Blackberry, in Outlook, written in notebooks, and it's gotten me nowhere so far. Wow, that sounded a little OCD huh?

Anyway, enough about that. Moira has become my new life coach for now. (Don't tell her that she could be charging me!!)

Strength

I guess this entry, and this week, is about strength and persistence. The ability to keep going and be positive even though god has thrown a 2 ton burning pile of shi* in my path.

Where do I begin? Well I have been calling the unemployment office for 2 days trying to get a reservation for a certain class that was tonight. That's the only way you can get in. I'm going to try again to get a real estate license and let NY pay for it. I found out there's another class next week in the morning that doesn't require a reservation, so I'm going to show up and pray they let me in. If not, I'll go in anyway.

Then, one of the jobs I've been interviewing for. Two interviews each almost 2 hours long. I had my 2nd interview last Thursday. They told me they'd call me Saturday to let me know. Nothing. I finally decided to call them today to find out the status. Turns out they hired a friend of theirs to do the job, and if it doesn't work out they'll give me a call. GEE THANKS! Could they maybe have figured that out BEFORE wasting my time? I can't stand inconsiderate people.

You know, I've been able to sell this energy (Energy Depot - see below if I've lost you on this one) for a while now. And since I vowed to be honest in this blog, I'll admit I haven't done anything about it. Well that might be a BIT harsh. I've done the webinars, talked with reps, printed out materials, ordered biz cards, prep prep prep. I just haven't gone out and SOLD it. I've been at the point where I've gotten up and dressed and ready to go, briefcase full, and then just couldn't get out the door. Am I afraid of success? Afraid of failure? Or just AFRAID. I don't know!

I know I definitely have a self-confidence issue right now. But who wouldn't in my position? Laid off for 5 1/2 months with no income. To be honest, it's humiliating. My friends go out, go on trips, and I can't be a part of pretty much any of it. Believe me I don't blame THEM, I'm not here to point fingers, I'm just saying that I wish I could be doing all of those things too. It's spring/summer in NYC, the BEST!!! Hamptons, weekend trips, rooftop happy hours! It makes me sad.

I saw an ad on Craigslist a few weeks ago about a free Life Coach. I had taken the email address down but never made contact. Last night I finally wrote to her because I'm feeling so blocked. They contacted me this morning and I spoke to the producer for about 30 minutes. At the end, she invited me to be a guest on her radio show on Friday! How crazy is that? If you want to hear me humiliate myself, contact me and I'll give you the website address to catch the radio show streaming. I'll be on at 11:30am Eastern Time, but you can listen on the website at any time. Here's hoping she can give me that *push* I need!

All in all, I will not give up, I will get through this, I WILL come out on top.

Au Revoir!

Rawr!

I'm having an irritating Tuesday so far, and it's only 2pm! First of all, my LAKERS lost. Boo!

Last week I had a 4th, yes FOURTH interview at a law firm, and a 2nd interview for a well paying p/t job. I tried not to get too excited, but I thought for SURE I'd get one of them. I was feeling SO good and positive. I was realistic and kept sending out resumes and "working on things" though. I figured as it was a 4th interview on Wednesday afternoon, that they'd let me know before the long Memorial Day weekend. I waited. The phone didn't ring, and still hasn't. I called and left the HR rep a voicemail this morning, I thought calling was more personable than emailing. No response.

The p/t job I met with on Thursday afternoon, they told me they would call me on Saturday. Nothing.

Common sense says, if I can get to a 4th interview with a company, then I must be doing SOMETHING right. I obviously have a good resume, I interview well, I dress appropriately and I'm well spoken. I've learned to not interrupt and LISTEN during interviews and not talk too much. I'm always punctual. But I'm still not GETTING the jobs.

10 years ago when I was unemployed, I clearly remember driving to interviews or sitting in traffic, watching people walk down the street or sitting at a restaurant and wondering what they did for work, and how come they had a job and I didn't. I'm NOT falling into "poor me" mode, I PROMISE. But I guess today I'm frustrated. Because of that I slipped on the gym for a few days, but I'm on my way out right now to work on it.

Enough complaining. I will not give up, I will not lie down and let this take over. I will keep working hard, keep persisting, being proactive, trying to keep my mind busy and keep my body in the gym. I will NOT let this economy win.